Marvelous Sunday

Do you ever have those days that completely rejuvenate you? That was my Sunday.

I woke up today not expecting much. I was determined to go to church despite any pain I might experience. I took the medicine the doctors prescribed before we went to stave off the pain (the medicine sucks by the way, but it takes the edge off the pain).

Everybody got ready and we went to church. Worship was amazing. I love worship, it totally prepares my heart for the message. Our pastor and his two daughters do the worship and let me tell you they are amazing. I love it. The message was great. It really resonated with me. Afterward I was able to fellowship with friends. One great friend in particular was amazing. I unloaded and he just listened. He was understanding and didn't judge. I unloaded about my anger towards God for all of the stuff Derek and I have gone through. I hate the anger and my attitude, but it just sits there like an unmovable boulder.

Then he said something that blew me away. He went through some stuff and he said he kept asking God why. He realized it's not the why. It's the who. I was like IT IS THE WHO! HE can move the unmovable boulder of anger. HE can comfort me. HE can walk with me in this odd and painful journey. HE WILL take care of me, Derek, and my beautiful children. I instantly felt so much lighter. My heart feels joyful for the first time in a long time. I'm enjoying life and I'm excited about life for the first time in a long time. Before we left our pastor and this good friend of ours prayed over Derek and I. It was wonderful. I felt God in our little circle. He is moving and working. The best thing of all? He loves me, unconditionally.

I love this day. God is so good. I'm also excited for this Friday. We get to go to dinner and fellowship with good friends. Then I get to go to a movie with Natasha and Melissa, it's going to be awesome!! God is drawing me close and I'm loving it.

P.S. A prayer request: I'm seeing a neurologist this Wednesday the 19th. Please just pray the doctor is nice and they can figure out what is going on. Thanks guys. Have a great Monday!

A Day Late

Even though I wasn't born yet 32 years ago my life changed. My husband was born, May 23, 1976. I thank God everyday that He chose to bless me with this man. We have the most wonderful marriage, more than I ever thought I would have. Growing up with divorced parents I was always afraid that history was doomed to repeat itself (don't feel bad, Mom). I thought I would end up marrying a guy like my father, but when we put our trust and hearts in God's hands He makes sure history doesn't repeat itself.

When I was a teenager I used to list the qualities I wanted in my husband to God. I listed the normal teenage stuff-good looks, romantic, sensitive...etc. What I didn't realize was that God had him picked out. Even then God knew who he was and was cultivating him to be my husband and a father to our children. I laugh as I look back at that time. The qualities I listed were so superficial. God not only gave me what I wanted for a husband he gave me what I needed. Sometimes Derek is a little too pushy (at least I think so), but I need that. I'm a procrastinator and if Derek didn't push I wouldn't get things done. So pushiness wasn't on the list of husband qualities I desired, but God knew what I needed. I love reflecting days, they make me appreciate what I have.

A Heart and Attitude Adjustment

On May 16th I received 3 books that I know are going to change my life. Derek bought me "A Woman After God's Own Heart, A Wife After God's Own Heart, and A Mother After God's Own Heart" in a box set for my birthday. I started reading "A Mother After God's Own Heart" first because if you couldn't tell from last post, I've been struggling.

The first 4 chapters or so that I've read have been amazing. God is changing my heart and attitude through this book. I feel energized, hopeful, and determined. I haven't felt that way in awhile. Praise God! He is always faithful to show us the Way.

I want to thank you wonderful woman who read my blog. You were all so supportive and I could feel your prayers. I'm praying for all of you. God bless!