Where is God in our troubled times? Where is He when the pain overcomes our faith and reasoning? Where is He when our tears soak the pillow? When we feel as if we are going to drown in those tears?
I imagine this is how the Israelites felt while they were wandering in the desert searching, exhausted and broken. Minus the pillow of course. Being broken is a painful and necessary process. Jesus was broken when He gave His life for us. If the Savior had to be broken who are we to think we don't need it?
One of my favorite verses in Jeremiah says "For my people have committed two evils; they have forsaken me the fountain of living waters, and hewed them out cisterns, broken cisterns, that can hold no water"
When God breaks us we are low, we are desperate, and we are pliable. We can't hold anything. The great thing is that God doesn't ever leave us broken. He picks our broken, tear stained body up and carries us to a magnificent place. A place that is filled with grace and love and peace. He builds us up into someone that we no longer recognize. Someone filled with His Holy Spirit who loves and forgives and starts to resemble our Creator. Which is our goal in this life right? To become as like Him as we can. That can only happen by shedding our flesh and sin and running to Him. We have to be willing to be broken as many times as it takes. I'm being broken right now. My chronic pain is a lesson. He's showing me that I have no strength apart from Him. I can't go through this life on my own. I can't be successful on my own. I can't become the mother or wife I desire to be without Him. I can't be a great friend, sister, or daughter without His grace and presence in my life.
Are you willing to be broken? Are you willing to allow God to take complete control of your life? Are you willing to ask God the scary questions and get answers you won't like?
Please be willing, please allow Him to break you. After the pain you will see the rainbow, you will experience Him fully, the way He intended the relationship to be when he formed you.
I'm broken and glad. Use me Lord, build me and form me into the magnificent person you envisioned before time began. I'm ready.